Saturday, January 3, 2015

(Lack of) Planning for 2015

I've been thinking about goals for 2015, and I've essentially decided not to set any really specific goals for this year. 

My broad categories are still the same as healthier/exercise more/lose weight, and write more... things that I haven't made much progress on the past few years despite my yearly goal declarations.  I usually set some very specific goals within those categories and then I don't meet them and I feel bad about myself, or guilty, and that's just not productive.

So this year, no specific goals, at least not in a long range way.  I still want to eat healthier/exercise more/lose weight, but I know what I need to do to do that, and setting specific goals such as exercise 3 times per week apparently doesn't help me do it.  I still want to write more, but obligating myself to write here a certain number of days or work on my ever languishing novel a certain amount doesn't appear to work either.

I'm not even setting any knitting or spinning goals this year.  I usually start off the year with some goals such as "knit a pair of socks per month" or "knit 2 sweaters", etc., but this year I've declared that I'm going to knit or spin what I want, when I want with no obligations or deadlines, not even self-imposed ones.  That doesn't mean I don't currently have some thoughts on what I might want to knit this year, or that I won't knit for others.  I just started a baby blanket for a baby due in 3 months, but you know what, if it's not done until after the baby is born then so what?

The fact of the matter is, I'm already very stressed about how the next 7-8 months of work are going to go, and I just don't need any other reason to feel guilty about not getting something done.  I'm not giving up, I'm not depressed, I'm just trying to give myself permission to take things as they come and do what I can do and not beat myself up for those things I can't.

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